Transgender Bathrooms

[Valerie Molinski]

How fitting that today, May 17th, is International Day against Homophobia & Transphobia.

"Free & Equal" is a United Nations Campaign for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Equality.
https://unfe.org/en/actions/fight

[Peter Grossetti]

It feels so odd to be standing up for the protection of woman and to be called a freak bible thumping conservative..

Yeah, that must really suck. Glad no one in this forum did that.

Words hurt, you know.

[Dan Alaimo]

Once an offical sex change occurs this is a non issue.

This may be Ryan's standard, but it's not North Carolina's. Their requirement is gender at birth.

This issue confounds me because I don't see the need to legislate it.
Also I'm not clear what supporters of the law are worried about. If it's sexual predators, voyeurs and exhibitionists, that's a different matter and a law enforcement matter, and those laws are already on the books, although no law will keep a determined predator/exhibitionist from acting out their inclinations, and these are different people than transgender individuals.

Having said that, I need to understand this better, because I sincerely don't get it. To borrow a catch phrase from John Oliver, "why is this a thing?"

[Peter Grossetti]

"why is this a thing?"

Because some people don't or won't understand the concept of "the inherent worth and dignity of each person" unless that person is just like me in thought and deed.

[Ryan Salo]

Dan,

Did you read the Obama letter? At any time for any reason anyone can claim to be the opposite gender and use alternative facilities. This opens a can of worms that most people I talk to and received emails and messages from agree will be a dangerous situation for girls and women. How can you argue with a horny boy who goes into the girls locker room to change after swimming class and claims to identify as a girl that day?

NC law states you must change your birth certificate sex which you can do once you change your parts. It is just requiring people to actually commit to their feelings...

This really shouldn't be an issue but the gay movement lost a lot of donations after gay marriage passed and this is an issue they are pushing hard for fundraising.

This is similar to the hospital issue, just follow the money...

[Amy Martin]

Salo sez:

This really shouldn't be an issue but the gay movement lost a lot of donations after gay marriage passed and this is an issue they are pushing hard for fundraising.

[Jeff Dreger]

Did you read the Obama letter? At any time for any reason anyone can claim to be the opposite gender and use alternative facilities.

No. That's not true.

"The Departments interpret Title IX to require that when a student or the student’s parent or guardian,
as appropriate, notifies the school administration that the student will assert a gender identity that
differs from previous representations or records, the school will begin treating the student consistent
with the student’s gender identity."

According to the letter that you posted, a student or the student's parent/guardian must inform administration of their gender identity should it differ from the records. Only then will the student be treated consistent with their gender identity.

The idea that some "horny" boys are just going to waltz into the girls locker room on a whim is total nonsense. It certainly wouldn't be any less a transgression than it is now. As Dan mentioned, laws against harassment, voyeurism, loitering, assault and so on are all still on the books.

I have two daughters in the Lakewood City Schools and this not something that I will be losing any sleep over. Date rape by "normal" straight guys? Now that's something that will concern me.

[Ryan Salo]

Jeff,

What constitutes notification? An email to the superintendent from a phone? How long does the student have to wait or is it instant? The wording is not clear at all. I am not losing sleep either but I am sure as hell going to fight for the rights of girls and woman to change in private without a gender confused person who isn't committed enough to their feelings to get a sex change.

In regards to notification, I would feel much better, but still not in total agreement, if it required parent or guardian approval and a note from a physician.

[Patrick Wadden]

Ryan, do you think that transgender is a "mental illness"?

[Ryan Salo]

Should be interesting when the "you can be anyone and anything" crowd fights for the "rights" of these folks. Who can say they are wrong?

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Species_dysphoria

This is a funny yet scary video of the future leaders of America.... we may be doomed as a society.... we as a nation are afraid to speak the truth in fear of offending someone. Sometimes the truth hurts.

http://www.breitbart.com/video/2016/04/ ... ese-woman/

[Amy Martin]

This is Julie, Amy's partner of 23 years. I would like to respond to Mr. Salo and others who feel they have the right to judge those of us who belong to the LBGT community. I have read your posts and it hurts to see a glaring example of the hatred that we still face.
Iris-you are an inspiration and a brave soul. I would share a bathroom and a beer with you anytime. Thank you to the posters that have expressed love, support and tolerance towards us deviants.
Mr. Salo-I have nothing but compassion for you. As a heterosexual male I am guessing you have never faced harassment or discrimination. If you are white, then I am even more sure of that. I have as my partner and the majority of the LBGT community have. I am glad you have never faced it because it is horrible and what it does to one's self-esteem should never have to be endured by anyone.
Let me assure you and any other doubters that we would never "choose" to be gay or transgender. Why would anyone choose to go through the hell we have had to go through? What I chose is was to be true to myself 23 years ago and not hide anymore. I spent the first 25 years of my life doing that and it was hell Mr. Salo. Amy said it best when she commented about support being the difference between life and death. I was there and can attest to her comment.
I firmly believe that you have never taken the time to get to know a gay or transgendered person so you remain uninformed and intolerant. Believe me when I say one of us has crossed your path Mr. Salo. Being gay is just aspect of me. I am also a daughter, an aunt, right handed, a Cubs fan, a supply chain analyst, a fitness buff - you get the point. Why do you get so hung up on one thing? How is my orientation a threat to you or hetro marriage?
Yes, I want the right to not lose my job because I am gay. You have that right - why shouldn't I? Do you realize in the state of OH I could get fired for that? Fortunately I work at a wonderful place right here in Lakewood that knows I am gay and support me. Amy goes to my Christmas party and when her mom passed in December they were one of the first to express sympathy and make a donation in her honor.
yes I want the right to marry the person who has loved and supported me for 23 years. I was able to marry a man who was borderline abusive to me. Had I stayed in the marriage I would be dead. But according to your logic that would be ok.
You seem to think allowing a transgendered person in the bathroom would lead to sexual assaults. I dig chicks-does that mean you are afraid to let me in the same bathroom as your wife or daughter?
Mr Salo, I implore you to open your mind and heart so that maybe we take a step closer to having a world in which we can all live together in peace.
I recently learned from a mental health profession that the voice we hear in our heads is the one we heard as a child. My guess is that your parents said the things you are saying. You can break that cycle and show your children that it is possible to open your heart and mind.

[Ryan Salo]

Julie,

I do not hate nor fear you. I think your lifestyle is wrong and hurtful to you, just look at the depression and suicide rates, just like I would admit to struggling with many sins in my life that cause me and others pain and suffering. As a Christian I cannot try to expect non believers to live in a Godly way, nor can I expect them to even agree with what I believe, but as an American I sure can fight for high moral standards because we have the right to do that, but we can argue this on another thread if you would like.

Although I am guilty of thread drift, this post is about letting males/females change with females/males based on feelings. I believe that if people are committed enough to their feelings to have a sex change then they should be able to change wherever they want. I am sure that most, if not all, of transgender people would not cause a problem. In my opinion the issue is how open Obama's rules are written that really would allow anyone to take advantage of the situation. I am hopeful most parents of transgender youth realize the potential emotional harm their biological boy could cause innocent girls by stripping nude in front of them. I also am hopeful most transgender people who are biologically male know how uncomfortable it would make woman to get nude in front of them. I believe most people are courteous however as a movement there seems to be no wiggle room, the example I posted earlier about the boy changing in front of the girls, the school tried to make both parties happy but the movement wouldn't let it go until the girls were forced, by the government, to see a male get naked in their locker room. Do you truly feel that is the right decision? Don't you see the can of worms that opens? If you expect compassion for your rights why can't you expect compassion for others rights?

[Amy Martin]

Ryan, I can't believe that you just classified all LGBT folk as non-believers . . .

[Bridget Conant]

Why are you so worried about protecting "innocent" girls and women, yet you've never mentioned protecting men and boys from being "observed?" That right there is so sexist and paternalistic - and you don't even seem to realize that aspect of your postings!

[Iris Nejedlik]

Reverand Ryan says that he wants to save our wicked souls from self-destruction and misery. And it is certainly true that LGBT people experience depression at higher rates. That is because we have to deal with adversity at higher rates, and people who want to let us know what sinners we are on a daily basis. We have to deal with people who will do their damndest to keep us out of workplaces, homes, and society in general. We have to deal with family who will throw a teenage kid out on their own because Jesus told them to.

I, personally, have the luxury of being happy. And what makes me happy is that after decades of turbulence, I've finally accepted and become who I've always wanted to be. What makes me most happy of all is coming home at night to the most beautiful woman in the world,who share my life with. The one person I can always count on, who knows me better than anyone else ever has. To bigots, we are a couple of confused and hell bound men who need to separate ourselves and repent. Why? To lose her or the life I built would make me miserable.

I don't believe people like Ryan can be taught to understand that love has many different shapes. I think that we can argue with him until we are blue in the face, and achieve nothing. But this thread is still very positive and important because it allows him to reveal that his side is motivated by ignorance and hatred. And when people can see that for what it is, bigots become marginalized. i want to thank Amy, Julie, and everyone else who has responded here because it has demonstrated that we live in a fantastic community where decent folk outnumber the haters 10-1. I'm really glad that Lakewood is my home.